That said, as human beings, we are programmed to have partners, and to find the greatest joy in life, and I don’t think that having an F buddy is going to provide ALL the joy that you deserve. It can be fun, but it will only be temporary. So I always invite you to ask yourself a question: What if you thought about true love and let go of the heartache that love has caused before?
For just a moment, forget your sentimental past and all of the pain that went along with it. If I ask you to focus solely on your deepest desires, the things that bring you the most amount of joy, and especially on the new things that you could incorporate into your life, how can you imagine your daily life-changing?
The more you work on being truly happy and fulfilled, and creating excitement in your life, the more this person is going to want to invest in being your partner.
CAREFUL! This doesn’t mean that you should become obsessed with him or her… In order for a relationship to become established, you are going to have to find a balance and give each other a healthy amount of space:
Personal life (your passions, your health, your image…) Professional life Friend circle Family life Romantic life
Human beings always want more so a fleeting relationship or a one-night stand type situation doesn’t work in the long run
Of course, you can consider the positive aspects that I outlined above, (like having no obligations), but you’ve got to define a better framework because a relationship like this will almost always result in questions about the next step.
Even when you’re on the same page in the beginning, you run the risk of one of the two people involved wanting a bit more… or a bit less. What I mean by that is that either someone ends up wanting a more stable relationship, or they end up finding someone else (either for another fwb relationship or even for something more serious).
Before you begin thinking about having sex with friends, it’s important that you weigh the pros and cons. If you end up getting attached, you’re going to start to have doubts and will consequently act differently. You need to be prepared for what kind of emotions can come up!
If on the other hand, you really feel that you have a heart of stone and you just want to enjoy carnal pleasures, then having a friends with benefits relationship isn’t a terrible idea in and of itself. The main thing is that you are careful not to make the other person suffer. You don’t want to go from fwb to a form of manipulation. Things need to be very clear for both people involved or you risk winding up in a very sticky situation… So there are positive elements of having a friend with benefits!
I’m perfectly happy being a friend with benefits… But for how long?!
There is nothing better https://kissbridesdate.com/taiwanese-women/ for illustrating my point than sharing the story of a woman with whom I worked a few months ago. I know that many men and women are in the same situation as she was. I remember the conversation I had on the phone when Julie, a young Parisian executive, called me. She had just entered the professional world and wanted no emotional obligations.
She still contacted me because she was feeling lost in terms of her emotions. Having a friend with benefits is fulfilling for a certain amount of time, but after a while, the issue of investment and feelings will inevitably arise.